Grief is a funny thing, it sneaks up on you when you least expect it. You might think it is the big days – the anniversaries, Christmas, birthdays – that are the worst. That is not the case for me. I am expecting those, I can prepare myself, brace myself, the sadness comes, but I’m prepared and its manageable.
It’s the other days that are worse. The ones where it takes me by surprise and, because I’m unprepared, my defences are down and it takes me over completely. It can be an innocuous thing that starts it; something on the TV, a throwaway comment, a magazine article. A song on the radio. Sometimes there is no discernible reason. On those days, the grief can engulf me and render me completely immobile.
Today is one of those days. I feel completely bereft today. Worse than last Wednesday, when it was his birthday. Today I am just in a corner, feeling lost. This is not the blog post I had planned today, but it is the one I am sharing because, it is on days like these that we need someone to reach out to, we need to know we are not alone.
I’m sharing again here my post from last week. Please read it and, on this last day of Baby Loss Awareness Week, please get involved. People like me need your help to live with our grief. Please visit the Baby Loss Awareness Week website to see how you can get involved. And tonight, during the Wave of Light at 7 pm, perhaps you can light a candle, along with people across the world, and remember those of us who have lost a child.